I guess this would have been more meaningful and useful if I had written prior to my leaving the US of A in mid-May. Nonetheless, I still have a large mixture of jumbled feelings leading up to this adventure. Leading up to my previous trip where I spent about 6 weeks in another country, I had almost no time to even think about being anxious about the upcoming summer, because finals consumed my life right up until it was time to pack. I think this was all for the better, because this gave me no time to build up huge expectations. This helped in dealing with being content with what I have and will have, no matter where I am. I can't even begin to go into detail about those wonderful 6 weeks without writing and thinking for hours and hours. Pages upon pages would not suffice to describe the full amount of what I experienced and learned their in dealing with understanding a new culture and sharing with people what it is that I believe. In a very small version, I got a glimpse of what it is to love someone by understanding the reasons behind what they may believe or not believe. As a result, I was able to also learn how to share my faith, that is in Jesus Christ, without jamming a Bible down anyone's throat or anything of that sort. I was able to really become friends with these locals despite our drastic differences in almost every aspect of lifestyle, because our blood still runs red.
That being said, as that trip came to a close, fear and anxiety set in. I didn't want to leave these people that I had built such great relations with, but I really think it again for the better that I was forced into another culture shock. This time, though, I was forced into it by myself. There was a short period I was really excited to be on my own, travelling where I want and doing whatever I want. This didn't last, and I was quick to miss the people I had spent about a month with in close quarters. Now that I've spent several days virtually on my own, I'm okay with how things are but still so excited to finally get to meet my host family and have some order to my life. Also, I can't wait to have some people back in my life that speak Texas English. German English is good compared to much of the world, in my opinion, but there is nothing like being able to use "y'all" and be understood.
I think I want to work on enjoying the little things and being content with what I have on my plate. I mean this metaphorically and actually, because I love food. There is not much that I won't eat and enjoy. I expect to learn even more about molding myself into a culture that is not my own. I want to learn how to make it my own and fully understand the people for who they are. The same goes for getting to know the people on the study abroad with me; I want to get to know all of them individually. I want to work on team building skills, so that each person has an equal part of the group. I want to reach each person on a level where their individual needs are met for the sake of bettering the group and increasing our comraderie.
All in all, I literally cannot wait for the next few days to go by, so that I can meet everyone again and get started on this new adventure. I realize that this second half of summer may be hard, because I've already been away from home for about 7 weeks. I will try to just not think about that fact for most of the session, rather I'd like to just look forward to what joy I will experience on returning to family and friends. Also, I will focus on what joy I experience with new friends and learning experiences. I want to remember the very best of people and places, rather than focus on what I did not enjoy. I like to look for the very best parts of people I meet and encourage them in that way.
While there are people and things that I miss from my previous summer adventures and Texas, I look forward to the adventures that have been placed before me. I know that I will learn much in my field of study and about people from other countries and my own.
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